The blur months

Perhaps, in some limited ways, a blog can say as much through the absence of posting as it can through actual posts.

It does seem fair to say that the absence of activity around here is in some sense a record of my life, lately, or at least of the disruption of my life’s former routine.

Seven months ago, I wrote

After weeks of dithering, our city council has confirmed the November general election as the date for our referendum on their vote to close our community hospital. So, just under 35 weeks to go. 😐 Then I can (maybe) have my life back!

We’re now down to just more than four weeks. And whatever I imagined was the case in March, in the past five or six weeks this campaign has really “just about maxed-out my personal energies,” in ways which challenge me to find a personal precedent.

I hardly know where to begin.

On a personal level, life has become so different. It has now been a bit more than a year since the last period of real, extended quiet like those which I experienced with some regularity during the past decade. Last September, e.g., with a seasonal slowdown in freelancing work, I had peace, quiet and even boredom.

Since then, no. Even when work has slowed down, this year, tranquility has remained a memory only. Always some new thing going on. Meetings… meetings… documents to write, documents to design… strategy to consider… e-mails… phone calls… reading, analysis and posting.

In June, I basically created the outlines of our campaign along with a web site for it by myself over the course of a couple of weeks. Later, perhaps in July or early August, I spent nearly every waking minute of one weekend writing an exhaustive case for one particular endorsement. Since late August, I have generally been putting in full-time hours, seven days a week, on the campaign against Issue 64.

This is tiring.

What strikes me most is how my reading has gone to crap. Challenging reading that I would have enjoyed, once, just feels so hard now. Lately I start all kinds of books but find it so difficult to complete them. My intellectual resources just get used up.

So much of life seems to have become attenuated. The campaign, some work, basic activities like work, dishes, eating and (usually) sleeping… plus I have just about managed to keep Hancher vs. Hilton on schedule. That’s pretty much it.

So much else is crowded out by drama and craziness. Both within our campaign, and in the maneuverings between ourselves and our opponents… in recent weeks events have basically reached boiling point. And have not strayed far from it since.

Many stories could be told, along these lines. Some have been told already, elsewhere; perhaps more will be told, at some point. I continue to imagine some future in which I can step back and really process all of these experiences, over the course of months or a year.

For the next month, though, it’s now primarily a matter of survival and relative sanity. Perform work, meet deadlines, don’t explode or collapse.

So, if I say nothing at this blog for a further while, that may be regarded as saying something by itself.

Comments are closed.

Post Navigation